“A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary.”- Dorothy C. Fisher


The quote for today’s date from my desktop diary, the original source for these daily articles, wasn’t wholly appropriate – so I went looking for one that was and I found this.

It resonates so well because we see examples in nature all around us of maternal care that teaches offspring how to survive and thrive without having the constant sense of needing to  depend on their mothers, none of which diminishes the love a mother feels for her young.

This is no different to how we tend to raise our own children – to feel loved and supported enough to stand on their own two feet and develop their own sense of independence, yet continue to experience support, advice, compassion, care and love through life. Sure, there are times when nothing feels better, safer, more comforting than to lean on the shoulder of our mother, when things get tough and we seek reassurance……but not for too long, eh?!

Most of us can think of a key learning lesson our mothers passed on to us that has enabled us to practise independence of thought and action, maybe a moral lesson, maybe a key tactic in decision-making. Whatever it was, it influenced and shaped how we interact with our world. And no matter how hard things were for our mothers when raising us, the love of a mother is a force to be reckoned with.

Mine raised me with a sense of fairness and justice bordering on the ferocious. Such passionate commitment to social issues taught me not to lean, not to overly-depend on others for things like moral guidance but to make, and stand by, my own decisions, which eventually saw me pursue a career with the concept of healing at its core – so that others can feel that leaning is unnecessary and they can thrive again.

There is another reason for choosing this particular quote today and it confirms my belief that there are no coincidences in life. Her married name for the last few decades is like our author’s – Fisher – and today is my mother’s birthday! Therefore it felt doubly apt. 

My mother is one of the strongest yet softest people I know. She is firm yet generous, strict yet fair, tough yet loving and she has successfully taught me to stand strong, even in the howling gales of life’s storms. I’m so grateful to her for that. Happy birthday, mum……

What has your own mother given you for which you are most grateful? Tell her today!

Love and light……and mums! 👩🏽‍🍼 👩🏻‍🍼 👩‍🍼 👩🏿‍🍼 👩🏾‍🍼

Jim Sharman


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